Forgiveness

This post is going to be short, but I was certain that there needed to be an explanation.  I'm sure that most of you have noticed a lack of pictures with myself and my sister Becky over the past several months and even a lack of pictures with my new nephew, Finn.  I am not trying to justify my actions AT ALL, but it's been a rough year for me and my family.  My pregnancy was not as it should have been, neither was Colin's birth.  So, when I found out my sister was pregnant when Colin was still in the hospital, I proceeded to completely shut her out.  I didn't speak to her for a long while, then when we transferred to Columbus, she made the effort to come to talk to me and we came to a resolution, but I still stayed distant.  What I failed to communicate with her was that it was hard.  It was hard to see someone have a perfect pregnancy, especially someone so close to me.  But, it wasn't her that I was upset with, it really wasn't anyone.  I was upset that I did not get to experience the easy pregnancy with the perfect labor and delivery.  My whole situation was scary, and it continues to be.  Selfishly, I took things out on her and it wasn't fair to her.  I caused her pain and that is something that I have to live with right now.  We had a long talk today, and graciously, my sister has forgiven my actions.  I got to meet my beautiful nephew and look forward to building trust and having the same relationship with my sister as I did before.  She was my best friend, and hope that we can come to that point again.  I thank God for her and her forgiveness.